Sunday, May 20, 2012

A moment to exhale

If my heart was overflowing with love and gratitude for Christ before... now, it's bursting!

On Friday I had my follow up appointment with my oncologist. I didn't even notice I was nervous about my appointment until we were there. After waiting for what seemed to me as much longer than it actually was, my doctor came in. My blood work from 2 days prior all looked excellent, and I quote him, "you wouldn't even know I had given you any chemo". :) Haha, so I guess I'm still really healthy?

He then examined me. The verdict? Well, he believes the tumor has disappeared just as we had thought/hoped! As for what's next, I will be getting another MRI done on my breasts very likely this next week. This way my surgeon will know exactly what is or isn't there yet. Then I'll probably be going to appointments to discuss my surgery and reconstructive surgery, etc.

After the details of surgery are squared away, I should get a breather for a while. My oncologist figures they'll want to wait until early-mid June to do my surgery so my body has had time to fully recover from my last chemo session.

But the best news of all? There's no definite plan for any further chemo! In fact, he's hopeful that as long as my pathology reports come back looking good after surgery, there will be no need for more chemo. Praise the Lord!

I will be praying hard for that. I'm not sure I can mentally/emotionally withstand another 4 rounds.

That said, I had a very tough time dealing with that last round. The accumulation of all my treatments had me down and out for a solid week.

Jason thought he'd surprise me and try to cheer me up by taking me to see The Avengers last Tuesday as we'd both really wanted to see it. Very sweet and valiant effort on his part, but it was just too soon. My body was so fatigued, I came home and slept for several hours afterwards. That was sad because all I did was sit somewhere other than home for a few hours and I was still exhausted.

When we went to get my blood work done (as we do every week) on Wednesday, I got winded just walking to and from the car. I was beyond frustrated and at my maximum capacity for dealing with all this chemo-symptom nonsense. I let my boss know I wouldn't be in for any of my shifts for the week. I was so scared I was going to show up at work and be unable to stay, I figured it was safer to just have someone able-bodied there in my stead. Lol

Thankfully Diablo 3 came out earlier in the week to help stave off the boredom and to get my mind off this yucky stuff. Oh yeah, readers who may not know me personally, I'm a geeky gamer girl. :3 haha, but seriously, I've been waiting for this game to come out for ooh... a decade? Yep. I was even playing original Diablo back when I was 11 years old. I'm that awesome. Anyhow, I was very happy with the distraction.

I'm pleased to say as of yesterday, I felt much more like myself again. Still feeling many side effects that are lingering ones of course. My tastebuds are still wacky and off. My internal thermometer runs warmer than normal, and I often get night sweats. I also have dry mouth that won't quit. Can't wait 'til these all disappear too. For now though, I'm just relieved to know there's no planned chemo in my future. ;)

Ahh yes, and while I don't have any NEW hair growth... what I do have left has been growing a bit. I do wonder how long it will be until I get new growth? Only time will tell I s'pose.

And next Sunday, we're going over to my parents to have a mini "no more chemo"/birthday party for me. My brothers will be there with their wives and kids, and I haven't seen most of them in months. So I'm super excited for that. ^_^ Also get to see my kitty, which Jason and I had to leave with my parents because our apartment is too small, so YAY!

Oh, and there will totally be beer at my mini celebration. Haha. I have been craving a good beer and was scared to have alcohol during all this. So yay for family, kitty and beer! Haha.

Now though, life can return to normal for a spell. I work all this week, and I suspect I work all next week too. That's fine with me. I will never take feeling normal and living normally for granted. It's a gift that should not go unappreciated, much as each day is.

I also made it to church this morning. It was the first time I had gone since before my treatment began. I said a whole lot of formal thank yous while I was there. It felt amazing, and I'm glad I was able to feed my soul. I needed a recharge!

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:19

That's truly all the news I have for now. I will post updates once I've got news to share, but for now, I'm happy to have nothing else and grateful for the upcoming normalcy. :)


  1. Man what a relief this all is! After the hell we've been through the past few months I would've been happy with some minor good news, but we were given everything we could possibly want and more!

    The relief still hasn't completely sunk in. It's such a drastic change in the way the past few months have been for us that I can't quite get a grasp on it.

    I know we're not 100% done with this yet, but hopefully the difficult part is behind us. I wouldn't wish that kind of life on anyone, and I pity those who have to go through it.

    Thank you all for everything you've done for us through the chemo. The little things helped the most.

    I'm looking forward to things getting back to normal for a while. This situation changed me, and I feel like a complete train wreck compared to who I was before this happened, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it was needed.

    Love you very much and I'm looking forward to life continuing on for us once this is finished.

  2. Aw Anj, this is so great to hear! Praise the Lord for His devine intervention. I am so grateful for Him and for taking care of you during this horrific time in your life. I am also so grateful that He is there for Jason too. You two are so strong and this will by far make you much much stronger as a couple, more than you could have ever imagined. Life is a precious beautiful thing and I am soooooo thankful that you are on your way to being a SURVIVOR of this! I am supporting you all the way over here in Okinawa!! I have my pink ribbon on my car, a FUCK CANCER tank top on and am always wearing my wristband in your honor. I love you SIL!